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Paige wheeler folio literary management1/17/2024 I’m always tempted to forward the pitch to the author and say, “Is this really who you want representing you? Someone who couldn’t be bothered to actually try to get me interested in your book?”Īgents who see on Publishers Marketplace that I’ve just acquired a book with LGBT subject matter and then bombard me with identical projects, thinking, “Hey, he’s buying LGBT stuff!!” I’m at a tiny press with a diverse list. “Thought you might like this.” I get that from agents I’ve never had a conversation with (and they usually haven’t done an iota of research on my house to see that I don’t do books like that). While we’re on pitches, how about lazy agents who don’t even pitch. I get to the end of their query and I have no idea what the stupid book is about. Just go on and on about how the author won this award I’ve never heard of or that they’re really good at taking direction. FYI–those tend to be auto-rejects for me.Īgents who don’t include A SINGLE SENTENCE OF SYNOPSIS in their pitch. I read a project on my schedule, not yours. These deadlines are ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS ludicrous. Kvetching on a public forum, even if you’re not naming names but especially if it’s a blanket whine aimed at all editors who might decide to “annoy” you in future, is unprofessional and whiny and does NOT make me want to work with you.Īgents who set arbitrary deadlines as to when they expect to hear back from me (or….what exactly? You’ll pull the project? You’ll send the Timing Police to rough me up?). It annoys me.” I don’t even care if ALL editors do whatever it is. Usually looks something like :”Editors: Don’t do this. Just for fun tonight, just because I think a little pre-holiday raging is called for, I wonder if you would share your worst agent story and no need to mention names (especially if it’s me).Īnother Anonymous Editor, on Decemat 2:28 am said:Īgents who take to Twitter to air a grievance against ONE editor but make it sound as though everyone does whatever it is they’re ticked about. The guy gets all excited, really, he says, my agent came to my house. The cop explains that his agent had come to his house. You know the one about the guy who comes home to discover that his wife and children have been raped and murdered, and his house has been burned down. I’m proud of the job I do for my clients, but being a professional sleaze bag is a drag. I once took an agent out to lunch who looked at the menu and said, “If I have one more cobb salad, I’m going to kill myself.” Another pulled a bill away as I was figuring out the tip and said, “Gimme that, I know 15% of anything.”īut you didn’t ask me about agent lunches. Taking them to lunch so they could shit on your face, if you feel me. I hated most agents when I was an editor. I know many of you hate agents out there and I get it.
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